PingJe

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Dear Mom and Dad...

Parenting is a big job...and it is not easy to be a parent if you are not ready to handle all the problems that might occur during the 'parenting days'. But to be a parent is a blessed thing for many of us who like to become one. To see the child's face and smile after having a busy day at the office or wherever your workplace is...will somehow melt down your exhaustion and emptiness.

Being a parent means to be there all the time; whether you like it or not, you have a big task to do. Sometimes a child can cause a scene which you'll never like it, but you have to endure it like an adult - a parent must be an adult. Recently, I felt so sad when reading the news about a mother who killed her own newborn baby with a knife. She was said to have this kind of mental illness and she was not really herself while she was butchering her own flesh and blood. Her husband was in a local prison for three years now and I wonder, whose baby was that? Hmmm...

So, a parent with a mental issue should not be a parent, because she / he might harm the baby and the people around us. Nowadays, most parents are working hard to earn the best for for their families. Stress, hard work, nervous break down and so on can lead to mental illness. To be a parent - a good parent, you must know how to handle your stress before getting into the house facing your precious child. Although stress is a common thing, but if you cannot handle it properly, you tend to let out your inner feelings towards your child and not to forget to your own spouse. Domestic violence seems a normal thing nowadays. But it has the worst outcome for those who are involved with it.

Marriage is a sacred institution. Divorce, on the other hand is the ruins of a marriage. So, to be a good parent, you should know that quarrelling in front of  your children in not a good example for them when they grow up later. They might misunderstood that they can quarrel to solve a problem instead of discussing it like a human being. I believe in marriage and I do need help sometimes. That's why I like to read books and listens to motivational talks when I have the time to do so. Humans tend to make mistakes. But do not make so many mistakes so often that our spouse might think that we have mental issues.

For normal wives out there, seeking help doesn't mean that we are weak. Seeking help means we want to mend the holes inside our marriage and family. Do tell your husbands what you are feeling right now. Don't simply yell at them telling them that they don't understand you. Husbands are only humans too. They lack something too. So, we need to tell them that we need help in being a good parent.

For normal husbands out there, your wives need help in building the family. Don't simply let go and tell your wives to work on it by themselves. Women are fragile. But sometimes they can be the strongest creature ever - that's when you challenge them to do so.

Healthy children do come from a healthy family - starting with healthy parents (physically and mentally).

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