Two men were talking:
1st man: You know...I had a girlfriend last year...
2nd man: Then...
1st man: She has a fake leg...a wooden one...
2nd man: You must have loved her very much.
1st man: I did...but I have to break it off.
2nd man: Your relationship? Why?
1st man: Nope! Her leg....she likes to kick me with it! It hurts!!!!
Two ladies were talking:
1st lady: See that man? I'll bet that he's going to ask me out. He's even smiling at me!
2nd lady: Why it has to be you and not me? I'm beautiful as you are!
1st lady: Well....I have all that he needs....
2nd lady: Nope!
The man walked towards them while smiling.
Man: (To the first lady)....Hi...may I say something?
1st lady: (She smiles to her friend - winning the game).....Hmm...you have all my time.
Man: I can't let you go out like this. People are staring at your back.
1st lady: Hmmm...I know, my back is quite exposed tonight. You see...I'm wearing a Gucci dress tonight.
Man: Yup...I noticed that....but don't forget to take the label off your dress. It's kind of big for an
authentic dress, I presume.
Father: Have you done your homework?
Father: Have you cleaned your room?
Father: Have you packed your bag? And why are you still watching TV? You are supposed to get going. The
bus might leave you!
Son: But dad....
Father: I'm older than you are....do as I say...get going...
Son: But dad.....
Father: It's late now....
Wife: Honey....it's SUNDAY!!!!
Father: Oh...hmmm....okay...go to your room and study!
Husband: Honey, have you seen my glasses?
Wife: It's on the table!
Husband: Hmmm....where did I put it?...Honey, have you seen the newspaper?
Wife: On the same table!
Husband: Oh...I thought I have taken it with me....Honey....have you seen my pen?
Wife: Ughhhh.....it's on the same table which has your glasses and newspaper.
Husband: Why I can remember things nowadays? Am I senile? I still remember my 75th birthday last
Wife: (Getting out from the bedroom) Have you found all that you need?
Husband: And may I ask....who are you?