PingJe

Monday, October 11, 2010

A Sceptical Thought....

This morning I read an article written by a famous writer in Malaysia. I don't want to mention her name. It hurts me when she wrote that she has not got married yet because Malaysian men are not good enough for her. Who is she just to write something about that in general?

I'm proud to be a Malaysian. And I'm proud to be married with a Malaysian man. Actually, it is about her choices. I felt a little bit nauseated when I read the whole article she wrote about finding 'the correct husband'. She is now 40 and she has too much to offer (that's what she said about her). And she has mentioned about scientific research that a woman at the age 40 and above will have problems in conceiving children due to some sort 'technical problems' inside the woman's body. And she blamed the men because they tend to find younger women to be their wives.

From my personal point of view, you should not blame other people just because you are not able to find the correct match for you. You have to try to lower your demands before you choose the man of your dream. By the way...she needs a handsome man with a bungalow and a sport car...(don't you see where the problems come from?)

Men are not really alike at certain point. They are different although we might say that it is in their blood to do 'their things'. So, we should not judge a man and then conclude that all men are the same. I'm a woman and I disagree with the written article. I felt that she has this typical thought of judging men.

If she is a-25-year-old lady, it would be the best time to settle down and have a family. A woman has her own biological clock. We cannot stop it from telling us that we have to stop producing our heirs. And then the husbands will say...it's time to find the new ones. Men will always be men, but we should not let it be in the middle of our relationship. By the way...I'm not saying that it is bad to get married late. It is a matter of finding the right match at the right time. It is all in the God's hand. (Allah has His ways for all of us).

In Islam also, our Prophet, Nabi Muhammad S.A.W once said that...getting married is one way to produce more Muslims and to prevent adultery. So, marriage is a sacred bond and it must not be based on human's lust on everything. If it is based on lust...the bond will not be sacred anymore.

I do agree that money is important, but to list down all the materials needed before knowing a person seems quite absurd to me. If you want to get married...choose a pious man, a man with a job (can provide you with food, shelter and clothes), a man who respects both his and the woman's parents, and not to forget...don't choose a man who can hit you easily.

I don't think that love is blind, but we are blinded by love towards someone that we thought we love so much. Love means to give, to share, to rejoice, to care, and to be together until death do us part. Choosing someone to love is not easy, but you have to try and not to let all the sceptical thoughts interfere with your choices.

In conclusions...don't simply blame other people for your own misunderstanding about something. You might end up hurting other people's feelings...

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